Classic Jurai Logo
  • Do your kinks have kinks? Asagiri can help you exercise them.
  • Know your Chi from your Hentai?  Then Satome may hold the secrets you crave...
  • Mechwarrior Online, Mechwarrior Tactics, and Hawken all look like promising platforms for HJ's next big push in the Mech world.  Stay tuned for more...
  • Nakajima Heavy Industries: When you absolutely, positively, need to kill everyone, right now!
  • Jurai Sake.  Are you Samurai enough?
  • Ever seen the future? Contact your local Heng Institute today!
  • Tokomi. Proudly serving the Royalty since inception. Yes, even the royal pains in the...
  • You wanna be a good soldier of Jurai? Get your butt signed up for the MWO! Do it NOW, soldier!
  • NEWKIES!  Don't leave Herotitus without them!
  • ANGEL Radio. Back on the air, back in your ear. Mecha music for Jurai & by Jurai!
  • Jurai - the exact nature of your catastrophe!
  • Are you a great pilot but your biological systems are failing you?  Contact Kagato-Armitage for an upgrade today!
  • Jurai Sugar Cookies.  All the energy you need to kick clanner butt!
  • Tai-shi Cola. Now with 50% more caffeine, 34% more ability, 200% more creativity, and one hell of a temper if you shake it enough! Tai-shu Cola.
  • Are you known as a pretty boy/girl? Ever screamed "Not the face! NOT THE FACE!" in a bar fight? Then Nisshoko could be the Family for you!
  • Protestors on Herotitus want to know why Jurai is still on a war footing with no reported battles. House Jurai officials have declinded to comment.
  • UPDATE YOUR BIO'S. How else will the enemy know how awesome you are?
  • Jurai Samurai Family.  Royal by name, royal by nature, and by appointment only...
  • Imperial Jurai Armed Forces PATCHES now available for pre-order! Get yours NOW!
  • House Jurai: coming soon to a planet near you.
  • Jurains boycott local stores for selling C:GB propaganda. The Bear Claw pastry, although tasty, is no substitute for Jurai Sugar Cookies.
  • Do your friends call you Mr Fix-It? Do you have an affinity with technology? The Ozora family is recruiting.
  • Jurai Offical denies increases in military research spending is a reaction to the increased threat of war in the I.S.

General

(Offline)

* [HJ]-GnuZ thinks the sooner he slips back into unthreatening anonymity the better ;)
<[HJ]-Phoenix> is that what you call her GnuZ?
<[HJ]-cyph> which would be scarier, a sane person piloting a mech, or an insane person yelling out "I LOVE YOU, YOU LOVE ME, EAT MY E R P P C"
<[HJ]-Maxtac_Heng> The wife seems to have all my PA slots filled right now...
<[HJ]-Nexx>: What up! Its the ohta train! "com'on ride the train... come'on ride it."
<[HJ]-MageRooster-Satome> Burning1, are you talking about IDE Lords? Always there are two, the Master and the Slave?
*** Joins: [HJ]-Juju
<[HJ]-Juju> arf
*** Parts: [HJ]-Juju
<[HJ]-Misato|afk> I guess that means Juju was about to log arf.
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng>: i need to kill something
*** [HJ]-Asmudius_Heng is now known as [HJ]-Asmudius_Heng|MWO
[HJ]-Maxtac_Jurai hands Asmu a clanner.
[HJ]-Maxtac_Jurai hands Asmu a gnome.
[HJ]-Maxtac_Jurai wonders which will die first.
[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng|MWO feeds the gnome into the reactor and watches it scream as he powers up his mech
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng|MWO>: powered by gnome agony
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng|MWO>: and clanner tears
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng|MWO>: :P
<[HJ]-Maxtac_Jurai>: Noice.
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> ALL YOUR MEATBALL ARE BELONG TO US!
<Geburah> Meatball meatball!
<Geburah> You have no chance to spaghetti. Make your cheese!
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> That sounded bad... :P
<[HJ]-MageRooster> Take off every meatball.
<Geburah> How are you meatballmen?
<Geburah> Ha ha ha
* [HJ]-Lynxcat decides to play some Laziest Men on Mars.
<Geburah> Are there stairs in your house?
* [HJ]-EvilMojo-Satome shakes his head and goes back to his work
<Geburah> Go and stand by the stairs.
* [HJ]-Illusion is now known as [HJ]-Pending
<Sir_Morson> Oh my God.. HJ, you are mother f*@$*(&@ers!
<Sir_Morson> FWL's
<Sir_Morson> Total Funds : -394,569,654 C-Bills
<Sir_Morson> I can't frikkin' jump! Now I gotta take out another loan.
<Sir_Morson> Son of a..
<&[HJ]-DJ-Lynx-ANGEL> Up next: epic metal for Haydon (it's a surprise)
<&[HJ]-DJ-Lynx-ANGEL> Followed by VAC for Gov
<&[HJ]-DJ-Lynx-ANGEL> AFTER THAT: WHO THE HELL KNOWS!?
<[HJ]-McGov> I never ever got VAC played on a clan/corp/guild radio..ever.
<[HJ]-McGov> people always said it was too loud and offensive.
<&[HJ]-DJ-Lynx-ANGEL> Welcome to HJ. We are too loud & too offensive. :)
[HJ]-MaxtacJurai   Time to cook up a batch of bacon and eggs for lunch, methinks!
[HJ]-Lynx|ARDJ   Best thing I ever said just now
[HJ]-Kickaha   Hmmmm I had cream corn & bacon Jaffles yummmm
[HJ]-Kickaha   Everything is better with bacon
[HJ]-MaxtacJurai   Even sex?
[HJ]-GodsHammer_   no
[HJ]-GodsHammer_   lol
[HJ]-Kickaha   Well mebby not sex....but then again...you could eat bacon while having sex.
[HJ]-Kickaha   I haveta try that
[HJ]-GodsHammer_   it could work mate
[HJ]-Kickaha starts a new bucket list of things to do next bkk trip.
[HJ]-Kickaha   1. "have sex while eating bacon".
[HJ]-Lynx|ARDJ   Kick, that is VICTORY right there.
[HJ]-Kickaha   2. "find out exactly where those girlz get the razorblades from"
[HJ]-Kickaha   3. "start a frenzied conga line by holding my ATM card in the air & run down walking st Pattaya"
[HJ]-Kickaha   Thats as far as I've got.....feel free to suggest more "bucket list" things.
[HJ]-Teralitha bucket list hmmmm
[HJ]-GodsHammer_   lol kick
* ELH-Frezer_Burn doesn't even want to start to pry in the depths of HJ's sickness, It's like quick sand, it swallows you up, and then you're really screwed
<[HJ]-Deft|webdesign> hey gnuz send me some warmth...i live in florida...it was about -10º C today:P
<[HJ]-GnuZ> That's fairly icy, admittedly
* [HJ]-GnuZ wonders how far his beast would o/c outside on such a night
<[HJ]-Maverick_KA> I see my self more as a aged colletable
<[HJ]-Haydon> * MariJ falls out of her chair and passes out
* [HJ]-Haydon has the guards take Mari to detox
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> Is that what you're calling it Haydon? :)
<[HJ]-Haydon> Yes, I try to be descrete when it comes to having ladies brought to your bedroom.  I try to help your reputation in public ya know?
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> Why thank you.
*** Quits: Vera (Quit: Kiss my ass, kiddies.)
* [HJ]-Burning1 finds the quit message somehow ironic.
<[HJ]-Burning1> She changes her ass often.
<[HJ]-Burning1> Ermm...
<[HJ]-Burning1> Sorry, quit message...
<[HJ]-Burning1> ARG!
* [HJ]-Burning1 hates you all. :-P
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> Your demoted to 18th Mech Washer's Bitch, Psycho.
<[HJ]Chu-sa.Nexx> Im so upset! My twinky didnt have any cream filling today!
<[HJ]-Noriko> Isnt that subject that should be kept between you and your girlfreind Nexx?
<@[HJ]-Haydon|Work> wow, I think Tai fixed that bug before i even finished reporting it
<[HJ]-Taipan|afk> I am a Heng Haydon :)
<[HJ]-Taipan|afk> I can feel the mental anguish of all HJ's
<[HJ]-Trickster> Only the anguish that's occuring in the next few seconds, heh.
<[HJ]-Taipan|afk> yes, that pain that comes a few seconds before they find another bug
<[HJ]-Maxtac_Heng|work> Heh... new from the Kerensky cluster!  ER Intelemouse Explorer.... blind your friends from up to 800m away with this baby... and it's green!
<[HJ]-Utahraptor> sad, strange people
<[HJ]-Haydon> Strange?  HJ at your service, ma'am :)
<[HJ]-MageRooster-Satome> I think what screws up my skills in MW is that I can't wiggle right...
<OA_AC> What do you plan on doing when you become a Periphery unit?
<OA_AC> You can't have the whole IS, Periphery states, and clans ticked at you... can you?
<[HJ]-Madmac_Tokomi> we have before
<Legion> so goodbye HJs, Jurai Jurai We Like Pie! <And dissapears in a puff of logic.>
<[HJ]-Misato> I will have you know I have never wasted a minion.
<[HJ]-Misato> occasionally lose a few on an ice cream run, but it was fine ice cream and well worth it.
<[HJ]-Belorion> How do we connect in what ever game we may or may not currently be playing in?
<[HJ]-OrcSoul> well if there's a satome or asagiri involved.. with many layers of protection
After launching a Planetary Assault on Clan Steel Viper's sector of Arcadia II in NBT:Mercs, their leader contacted Asmudius via Private Message.  Asmudius then opened a PM window with Haydon:

<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> <[CSV]Jager^Andrews> hell.. i'll give you 300 mill to leave now
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> <[CSV]Jager^Andrews> please tell me you guys are ready to leave the planet
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> <[CSV]Jager^Andrews> lmao
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> <[CSV]Jager^Andrews> do a brother a favor 
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> what is you response ;)
<[HJ]-Haydon> Haydon's Responce: After we take Arcadia IIC, if CSV give us Arcadia II prime without a fight, we'll not PA their other holdings.
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> i think he wants to talk to you now ehehehe

Having launched the attack on a whim, using nothing but "leftover" crap 'Mechs captured in various raids, House Jurai would go on to take the sector, and hold it against several attempts by multiple Clans to kick us out.  As far as we know, this is the only instance in any planetary league of an IS unit taking possession of a Clan homeworld in the Pentagon Cluster.  Oh, and we were just a Pirate Unit. :)
<[HJ]PlaneRunner> nyah! in my day, we blew up mechs with potatoes stuffed with dynamite . . .in soup can armor powered by gerbils . . .in -30 below . . .
<[HJ]PlaneRunner> AND! WE! LIKED IT!
<[HJ]PlaneRunner> They called us 'those idiots throwin' firecracker potatoes', or something like that. Only got one kill. A potatoe blew up in an Atlas' window, caused the pilot to jerk and trip.
<[HJ]-MageRooster-Satome> Do not try to name the servers, for that is impossible... only try to realize the truth... that there are no servers.
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