Classic Jurai Logo
  • You wanna be a good soldier of Jurai? Get your butt signed up for the MWO! Do it NOW, soldier!
  • Jurai - the exact nature of your catastrophe!
  • Are you known as a pretty boy/girl? Ever screamed "Not the face! NOT THE FACE!" in a bar fight? Then Nisshoko could be the Family for you!
  • Jurains boycott local stores for selling C:GB propaganda. The Bear Claw pastry, although tasty, is no substitute for Jurai Sugar Cookies.
  • Protestors on Herotitus want to know why Jurai is still on a war footing with no reported battles. House Jurai officials have declinded to comment.
  • Are you a great pilot but your biological systems are failing you?  Contact Kagato-Armitage for an upgrade today!
  • Ever seen the future? Contact your local Heng Institute today!
  • ANGEL Radio. Back on the air, back in your ear. Mecha music for Jurai & by Jurai!
  • Mechwarrior Online, Mechwarrior Tactics, and Hawken all look like promising platforms for HJ's next big push in the Mech world.  Stay tuned for more...
  • Jurai Sugar Cookies.  All the energy you need to kick clanner butt!
  • House Jurai: coming soon to a planet near you.
  • Jurai Offical denies increases in military research spending is a reaction to the increased threat of war in the I.S.
  • Do your kinks have kinks? Asagiri can help you exercise them.
  • UPDATE YOUR BIO'S. How else will the enemy know how awesome you are?
  • Imperial Jurai Armed Forces PATCHES now available for pre-order! Get yours NOW!
  • Tai-shi Cola. Now with 50% more caffeine, 34% more ability, 200% more creativity, and one hell of a temper if you shake it enough! Tai-shu Cola.
  • Nakajima Heavy Industries: When you absolutely, positively, need to kill everyone, right now!
  • Tokomi. Proudly serving the Royalty since inception. Yes, even the royal pains in the...
  • Know your Chi from your Hentai?  Then Satome may hold the secrets you crave...
  • Jurai Samurai Family.  Royal by name, royal by nature, and by appointment only...
  • NEWKIES!  Don't leave Herotitus without them!
  • Jurai Sake.  Are you Samurai enough?
  • Do your friends call you Mr Fix-It? Do you have an affinity with technology? The Ozora family is recruiting.

House Jurai Lexicon

Arcadia II C
Civilian
CommSpec
Debate, Discussion, and Discord
Hentai
Herotitus
Jurai Kombat
Jurai Sake
Jurai Story Time
Jurai Sugar Cookies
Kali
Macro
Newcastle
Newkies
Nihongo desu ka?
Ranks
Samurai
Warmaster
<[HJ]-Kanopus|AR_DJ> a cat, by definition meows at you.  a catapult, by definition, hurls a huge ass rock that could be burning, into your couch while you're petting your cat.
<[HJ]-Misato> Lynx, does the Jurai medical plan have a psychiatric clause?
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> This is JURAI Misa. What do you think?
<[HJ]-Gnuz> Aging - there's no future in it.
<[HJ]-Harlequin_Satome> i have missed alot while i was gone haven't i?
<[HJ]-Haydon> well, HJ conquered the known universe, in and out of the gaming world, but we got bored so we hit the universe's reset button so we could do it all over again.
* [HJ]-Haydon puts up the big 'Don't feed the Lynx' sign.
* [HJ]-Asmudius_Heng whispers "I see dead n00bs"
<sploon> this is the craziest channel, I've ever been in.
<[HJ]-Ani_Nisshoko> Oh sure, Smu, just rain on my parade why don't you! :p
<[HJ]-Haydon> ant parade?
<[HJ]-Ani_Nisshoko> Of course! Have you ever seen an ant line when it starts to rain? Mass chaos!!
<[HJ]-Haydon> they might actually enjoy smurf juice, though. take it back to their mound
<[HJ]-Ani_Nisshoko> Hmm.... but it would more than likely morph them into some kind of strange smurf/ant hybrid.....then we would ALL be dooooomed
<[HJ]-Haydon> and thus Gummy Bears were brought into existence
After launching a Planetary Assault on Clan Steel Viper's sector of Arcadia II in NBT:Mercs, their leader contacted Asmudius via Private Message.  Asmudius then opened a PM window with Haydon:

<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> <[CSV]Jager^Andrews> hell.. i'll give you 300 mill to leave now
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> <[CSV]Jager^Andrews> please tell me you guys are ready to leave the planet
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> <[CSV]Jager^Andrews> lmao
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> <[CSV]Jager^Andrews> do a brother a favor 
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> what is you response ;)
<[HJ]-Haydon> Haydon's Responce: After we take Arcadia IIC, if CSV give us Arcadia II prime without a fight, we'll not PA their other holdings.
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> i think he wants to talk to you now ehehehe

Having launched the attack on a whim, using nothing but "leftover" crap 'Mechs captured in various raids, House Jurai would go on to take the sector, and hold it against several attempts by multiple Clans to kick us out.  As far as we know, this is the only instance in any planetary league of an IS unit taking possession of a Clan homeworld in the Pentagon Cluster.  Oh, and we were just a Pirate Unit. :)
<[HJ]-cyph> which would be scarier, a sane person piloting a mech, or an insane person yelling out "I LOVE YOU, YOU LOVE ME, EAT MY E R P P C"
<[HJ]-Misato> I will have you know I have never wasted a minion.
<[HJ]-Misato> occasionally lose a few on an ice cream run, but it was fine ice cream and well worth it.
<OA_AC> What do you plan on doing when you become a Periphery unit?
<OA_AC> You can't have the whole IS, Periphery states, and clans ticked at you... can you?
<[HJ]-Madmac_Tokomi> we have before
<[DCM]Y.Surgeon> Lynxcat is to Darth Vader as I am to Luke .
<(C*)CockWave> Lynxcat is yer daddy Surg?
<[HJ]-Archer> anyone know the UN webpage url?
<[HJ]-Archer> (No, i'm not reporting Orc to the World Health Organization)
<[HJ]-Maxtac> How's it going Vera? Did you have a chance to screem for me yet? ^_^
<Vera> oh!
<Vera> i can do that right now
<Vera> hehe
<Vera> thanks for reminding me.
<[HJ]-Maxtac> and thank you for doing it! :)
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> Scream?
<[HJ]-Maxtac> yep
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> Max is getting HJ girls to scream for him? I have taught my troops well.
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> My work here is done.
<Vera> how long u want me to scream, max
<Vera> and what else did u want me to say?
<[HJ]-Maxtac> 4-5 seconds... like they do in all the good horror movies!
<[HJ]-Parkwood_Heng> Are you screaming in terror or screaming in pleasure?
<[HJ]-Parkwood_Heng> Oh, oops.....
<Vera> im screaming.
<Vera> :P
<[HJ]-Maxtac> And the other thing was a supriesed "What?" As if some creepy guy had just asked you to screem for him... oh he has... Heh!
<[HJ]-Parkwood_Heng> It it the 'Oh baby yes! AHHHHH!!!!' or the 'MageRooster get away from me with that tenticle you sick fuck! AHHHHH!'?
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> <-- wants to hear this scream later.
<[HJ]-Tera|civ3> everyone starts off as militaristic tho
<[HJ]-Tera|civ3> what lvl do you play
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> second easiest .. and i still lose usually :P
<[HJ]-Tera|civ3> do you try to win by technology?
<[HJ]-Tera|civ3> or by word domination?
<[HJ]-Tera|civ3> world
<[HJ]-Tera|civ3> or diplomacy?
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> depends on where i am at that stage
<[HJ]-Tera|civ3> wanna play?
* [HJ]-Haydon has a mental picture of major world powers playing scrabble to determine the winner in a military conflict
<[HJ]-Haydon>: how's HJ?
<[HJ]-Kyossed>: glorious and terrible
<[HJ]-Kyossed>: all will fall before it
<(C*13)Cinder> at least we aren't playing CBJ, talk about easy...they go down faster then a 10 dollar hooker
<[HJ]-Nexx>: What up! Its the ohta train! "com'on ride the train... come'on ride it."
* GBD|Ophelia sets mode -wang [HJ]-Bayonet_KA
<[HJ]-Maverick_KA> I see my self more as a aged colletable
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> sounds like sesame street ... "todays HJ is brought to you by the word SODOMY"
<[HJ]Asuka-san> FROST
<[HJ]Asuka-san> I NEED
<[HJ]Asuka-san> A BIG FAVORE FROM YOU
<[HJ]Asuka-san> I KNOW YOU WILL HAVE WHAT I WANT WITH A NAME LIKE FROST
<[HJ]Asuka-san> I NEED 20 DOLLARS
<[HJ]-Haydon> so, we'll have a bunch of little HJs piloting mechs in a few years then, Ripley? :)
<[HJ]PlaneRunner> a bunch of little HJ's? Can we call them Pokejurai's?
<[HJ]PlaneRunner> What, no Tamagothis?
<[HJ]PlaneRunner> First it starts out as a Batagothi . . .then moves up to full-scale Tamagothi.
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> No Spawning In The Dojo.
<[HJ]-1-TNT_Satome> My girlfriend's bad... she's over here asking me what I want on my Bushy.
<[HJ]-OzoraChappers> Actually heart of hearts, paradise would be n e where aslong as my true love was with me
<[HJ]-OzoraChappers> which as u all know is a bottle of beer and thus i am there already :p
<[HJ]-Burning1> Your kids, are being subverted by a fundimentally evil, and perverted cult known as jurai...
<[HJ]-Burning1> Tommarow, they will return speeking japanese, sipping sake, and wondering where you hit the handcuffs.
<[HJ]-Burning1> Can you possibly risk so much?
<[HJ]-Burning1> Down with jurai - for the children's sake.
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> <-- in a deep ass meeting
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> Tough ass too.
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> Not Davion ass, but ass.
St._George> if they can't fight or transport mechs, what can they do?
[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> use bad language?
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