Classic Jurai Logo
  • Ever seen the future? Contact your local Heng Institute today!
  • Are you a great pilot but your biological systems are failing you?  Contact Kagato-Armitage for an upgrade today!
  • Protestors on Herotitus want to know why Jurai is still on a war footing with no reported battles. House Jurai officials have declinded to comment.
  • Tokomi. Proudly serving the Royalty since inception. Yes, even the royal pains in the...
  • Tai-shi Cola. Now with 50% more caffeine, 34% more ability, 200% more creativity, and one hell of a temper if you shake it enough! Tai-shu Cola.
  • House Jurai: coming soon to a planet near you.
  • Jurai Sugar Cookies.  All the energy you need to kick clanner butt!
  • ANGEL Radio. Back on the air, back in your ear. Mecha music for Jurai & by Jurai!
  • Do your kinks have kinks? Asagiri can help you exercise them.
  • UPDATE YOUR BIO'S. How else will the enemy know how awesome you are?
  • Know your Chi from your Hentai?  Then Satome may hold the secrets you crave...
  • Are you known as a pretty boy/girl? Ever screamed "Not the face! NOT THE FACE!" in a bar fight? Then Nisshoko could be the Family for you!
  • Jurai Samurai Family.  Royal by name, royal by nature, and by appointment only...
  • Do your friends call you Mr Fix-It? Do you have an affinity with technology? The Ozora family is recruiting.
  • Nakajima Heavy Industries: When you absolutely, positively, need to kill everyone, right now!
  • Jurai - the exact nature of your catastrophe!
  • NEWKIES!  Don't leave Herotitus without them!
  • Imperial Jurai Armed Forces PATCHES now available for pre-order! Get yours NOW!
  • Jurains boycott local stores for selling C:GB propaganda. The Bear Claw pastry, although tasty, is no substitute for Jurai Sugar Cookies.
  • Mechwarrior Online, Mechwarrior Tactics, and Hawken all look like promising platforms for HJ's next big push in the Mech world.  Stay tuned for more...
  • Jurai Sake.  Are you Samurai enough?
  • Jurai Offical denies increases in military research spending is a reaction to the increased threat of war in the I.S.
  • You wanna be a good soldier of Jurai? Get your butt signed up for the MWO, MWT & Hawken betas! Do it NOW, soldier!

House Jurai Lexicon

Arcadia II C
Civilian
CommSpec
Debate, Discussion, and Discord
Hentai
Herotitus
Jurai Kombat
Jurai Sake
Jurai Story Time
Jurai Sugar Cookies
Kali
Macro
Newcastle
Newkies
Nihongo desu ka?
Ranks
Samurai
Warmaster
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> The worst thing battletech canon ever did to us, was inspiring a bunch of nutters to yammer about "honor" in this game.
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> Smack a bitch with an ac20. Merry Honormas.
<ELH>Lancelot> the hj scare me they are strange bunch
<[HJ]Poisoner> is here  to destroy Rock
<<WD>Archer> take a number
St._George> if they can't fight or transport mechs, what can they do?
[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> use bad language?
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> WEIRD: I'm going to work for Squall at his wife's my little pony con.
*** Quits: Vera (Quit: Kiss my ass, kiddies.)
* [HJ]-Burning1 finds the quit message somehow ironic.
<[HJ]-Burning1> She changes her ass often.
<[HJ]-Burning1> Ermm...
<[HJ]-Burning1> Sorry, quit message...
<[HJ]-Burning1> ARG!
* [HJ]-Burning1 hates you all. :-P
<@[HJ]-Lynxcat> wtf is a newkie?
<@[HJ]-Misato> Newcastle Ale. Very good brown fizzy stuff.
<[HJ]-GnuZ> a particularly unremarkable ale, Lynx.
* [HJ]-Asmudius_Heng whispers "I see dead n00bs"
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> <-- in a deep ass meeting
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> Tough ass too.
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> Not Davion ass, but ass.
[HJ]Tenchi> Were like little plush dolls that kill...
<[HJ]-cyph> which would be scarier, a sane person piloting a mech, or an insane person yelling out "I LOVE YOU, YOU LOVE ME, EAT MY E R P P C"
<[HJ]-AniMouse03> Technicly it has been proven that a turd CAN be polish.....just f.y.i.....
<[HJ]-Illusion|AR> I don't the Polish people enter into it Stale
[=Xerxes=] Paul Haiku: Nobody loves me/ Ungrateful Netmech bastards/ I might as well die
<[HJ]-Maxtac_Jurai> I don't care if it's been consumed by the arsehole of a giant space goat... I want that planet.
<[HJ]-1-TNT_Satome> My girlfriend's bad... she's over here asking me what I want on my Bushy.
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> Your demoted to 18th Mech Washer's Bitch, Psycho.
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> ALL YOUR MEATBALL ARE BELONG TO US!
<Geburah> Meatball meatball!
<Geburah> You have no chance to spaghetti. Make your cheese!
<[HJ]-Lynxcat> That sounded bad... :P
<[HJ]-MageRooster> Take off every meatball.
<Geburah> How are you meatballmen?
<Geburah> Ha ha ha
* [HJ]-Lynxcat decides to play some Laziest Men on Mars.
<Geburah> Are there stairs in your house?
* [HJ]-EvilMojo-Satome shakes his head and goes back to his work
<Geburah> Go and stand by the stairs.
<[HJ]-Kanopus|AR_DJ> a cat, by definition meows at you.  a catapult, by definition, hurls a huge ass rock that could be burning, into your couch while you're petting your cat.
<[HJ]-Archer> anyone know the UN webpage url?
<[HJ]-Archer> (No, i'm not reporting Orc to the World Health Organization)
<[DCM]Y.Surgeon> Lynxcat is to Darth Vader as I am to Luke .
<(C*)CockWave> Lynxcat is yer daddy Surg?
<[HJ]-Harlequin_Satome> i have missed alot while i was gone haven't i?
<[HJ]-Haydon> well, HJ conquered the known universe, in and out of the gaming world, but we got bored so we hit the universe's reset button so we could do it all over again.
<(SRM)Zyklon~WU~> You know Stinger, after all the smack talk I heard about HJ
<(SRM)Zyklon~WU~> these ppl are really cool
<[HJ]-FuzzyBunny_Nisshoko> Even being pink, I rarely die first. <[HJ]-Maxtac_Jurai> It's more like SHOOT AT ME! OVER HERE! I WANT TO DIE FIRST!
HJ-Lynxcat, live on AR: "it'll vibrate your desk.  It'll vibrate your bowels.  You'll have to take a crap after you hear this song."
<[HJ]-Maxtac_Heng> Lw is in your lace I believe Haydon.
<[HJ]-Haydon|AR> i don't own lace, max
<[HJ]-Haydon|AR> but LW in lace is disturbing, nevertheless
<[HJ]-Maverick_KA> I see my self more as a aged colletable
<[HJ]-Nexx>: What up! Its the ohta train! "com'on ride the train... come'on ride it."
<[HJ]-Maxtac_Heng|work> Heh... new from the Kerensky cluster!  ER Intelemouse Explorer.... blind your friends from up to 800m away with this baby... and it's green!
After launching a Planetary Assault on Clan Steel Viper's sector of Arcadia II in NBT:Mercs, their leader contacted Asmudius via Private Message.  Asmudius then opened a PM window with Haydon:

<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> <[CSV]Jager^Andrews> hell.. i'll give you 300 mill to leave now
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> <[CSV]Jager^Andrews> please tell me you guys are ready to leave the planet
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> <[CSV]Jager^Andrews> lmao
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> <[CSV]Jager^Andrews> do a brother a favor 
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> what is you response ;)
<[HJ]-Haydon> Haydon's Responce: After we take Arcadia IIC, if CSV give us Arcadia II prime without a fight, we'll not PA their other holdings.
<[HJ]-Asmudius_Heng> i think he wants to talk to you now ehehehe

Having launched the attack on a whim, using nothing but "leftover" crap 'Mechs captured in various raids, House Jurai would go on to take the sector, and hold it against several attempts by multiple Clans to kick us out.  As far as we know, this is the only instance in any planetary league of an IS unit taking possession of a Clan homeworld in the Pentagon Cluster.  Oh, and we were just a Pirate Unit. :)
<[HJ]-Misato> But hey. I can solder. Would you prefer a frail old granny who can knit, or a wizened old crone who can solder and drill? huh?
<[HJ]-Madmac_Tokomi> latter
<[HJ]-Haydon|AR_DJ> how about both?
<[HJ-C]-Heller_Asagiri> Latter.
<[HJ]-Misato> good Jurain answer! :)
<[HJ-C]-Heller_Asagiri> Especially if she's available.
<[HJ]-Misato> Careful getting too fresh w an ol granny w undiscloed items in that "knitting bag" that never leaves her side...
<[HJ-C]-Heller_Asagiri> So I have a thing for liverspots. Sue me.
<[HJ]-Misato> "Gramma Jurai, why is your knitting bag o heavy?" Nevermind sonny, there's a good boy. Go out and play on the firing range. Can never get too much practice, you know!
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